I got a new camera for Christmas. HAPPY!!!! I haven't had one for over a year now. Horrific. So many precious, unique moments and I couldn't capture them. This is over now. Here are some pics I've taken in Bristol and Bath over the last few days.  

 

 

YeP, in two days time I'll be on my way from London to Inverness.

By the bus for 15 quid. It's gonna take me 13 hours.

I'm gonna spend New Year's Eve in Scotland.

With a great friend.

And before that I'll be seeing my best sweetness Laura on Tuesday.

She's in London for 3 days.

THESE are things I'm so looking forward to. It's abnormal. 

And the best thing is, it's extremely within my reach.    

“The joy of brightening other lives, bearing each others’ burdens, easing others’ loads and supplanting empty hearts and lives with generous gifts becomes the magic of life.”

I do it all the time. I kinda feel its my duty, my mission. And I don't expect anything in return. But let it say it that way. I need love too.

There was this Bansky Gallery Q from 12 Nov- 24 Dec in Bristol. I had no clue. I was wandering around in Stokes Croft, talking about Banksy and suddenly I saw this sign telling me Enter Here! Snap!    

Quote: 

"In the summer of 2009, more than 300 000 people queued to see the Banksy vs Bristol Museum exhibition. They waited in all weathers for up to four hours to get in. The People's Republic of Stokes Croft saw the queue as possibly Banksy's greatest work of art and asked the queuers to 'express themselves' on specially made cards. They lost a lot of pens and a lot of cards, but in the end managed to collect about 3500 artworks. Katy Bauer, who conceived and ran the project, also filmed and took snapshots. THE BANKSY Q is a show of those who queued and all of their drawings."

I was planning to go to the Bansky exhibition last summer. I couldn't make it by no means. Otherwise I might have been in the gallery or in the book now..................

I get my prezzies today! It's only an english tradition to get them on the 25th which I think it's stupid haha.

It's my name day today. Adam and Eva. In Poland you don't celebrate birthdays. You celebrate name days. Happy name day for me then.

You know its time to keep it simple

Lets take a chance and hope for the best

   Life is short, so make it what you wanna

I climbed days on the history

I had a change of philosophy

I take these days as it comes to me
And I won’t take myself off that seriously

Take off your shoes, lay back, and take a load off

Give me your blues, let me love it away

Nothing to lose, so don’t act like such a grownup

the best thing about you is me

don't say no, c'mon just say yes

We're all people in progress

Life is the culmination of all the layers we add onto each other, stacking them high until just the remnants from the bottom-most layer shines through.  These are frozen layers of trees on more frozen layers of trees on more frozen layers of willow branches, and the light still shines through

And this is how Christmas markets look in Germany

"Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, to all the people you can, as long as ever you can." - J Wesley

A piece of home.
My dad came to visit me over Christmas. German and polish home-made food  and sweets.
plus Heavenly magic winter punch almond aromatic fruity tea
Mmmmmmmmmmmmm

There is a house built out of stone

Wooden floors, walls and window sills

Tables and chairs worn by all of the dust

This is a place where I don´t feel alone

This is a place where I feel at home

Cause, I built a home

for you

for me

Out in the garden where we planted the seeds

There is a tree as old as me

Branches were sewn by the color of green

Ground had arose and passed its knees

By the cracks of the skin I climbed to the top

I climbed the tree to see the world

When the gusts came around to blow me down

I held on as tightly as you held onto me

I held on as tightly as you held onto me

Cause, I built a home

for you

for me

And now, it´s time to leave and turn to dust...

Write about Love. Alright kids, I got a story to tell. Have a listen.

We found each other randomly on MySpace a long time ago. Millions of people and no mutual friends. We agreed it was no coincidence we met as we also both lived in separated countries at this particular time. We became very close friends and spent a very intense time together. We used to chat every day, used to send letters between us, we would share everything. We've been having so much fun together, joy and happiness hey ho. We've got unimaginable things in common, two like-minded souls found together in the wide wild universe, how lucky we are, some people never find one. We've grown a lot together, we've been learning from each other and inspiring each other immensely. He made me what I am today. I'm so thankful and proud his my friend. Without him, I would have killed myself back in August 2009. But suddenly there was this genuine, kind, cute, pretty and positive guy interested in my life when I was about to end it. 

 I've been investing incredibly much patience, consideration, effort, time, understanding, love, heart, sweat and soul for him, my heart would approach piece by piece. I don't know if it was delusion or wishful thinking or whatever but I was pretty sure his heart was moving closer and closer to mine as well or maybe he doesn't want to confess or allow it. Anyway, it took me a life time to find him. That's why I'm so tired of starting again somewhere new. But it seems I will have to pull my heart away otherwise I will ruin everything. Isn't that just unfair? I'm not blaming anybody. This is something pretty much beyond our control. It  still makes my heart squeeze, regardless. I'm sorry. I'd wish it wouldn't. 

Genuine love is passionate and filled with conscious communication and creative contribution. Love is always patient and kind, it is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited, it is never rude or selfish, it does not take offense, and is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people’s sins but delights in the truth, it is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes. Love does not come to an end.

This is everything I am, everything I am for you. 

so I will pull myself together, try to move on, to be there for him when he needs me as a friend.

our friendship is too precious and too special to ever let go.

End of Line.    

We didn’t talk about anything heavy or light. We were just there, together. And that was enough.
— The Perks of Being a Wallflower

I'm back in Bristol. I've spent a super lovely time in Market Rasen with Ben. I really enjoyed it. I felt at ease, it felt right. My birthday was great as well. Jägermeister Fanta, German beer, Tea shop, Tron 3D and this amazing Cafe in Lincoln, one of the best in Europe, with sheets of music on the walls and secrets written on postcards. My secret is well good. hehe. Finally seen the forest again, fed ducks, seen the weirdest sheep who are pooing simultaneously, some damn cool trials and other pretty things you can find in the wild. I could have easily stayed longer. It was well good. Thank you for all the effort and all the love.
My return journey wasn't that pleasant at all. I was pretty much on the way to freeze to death. The connecting bus from Birmingham to Bristol wouldnt show up. For 14 hours! I was left alone in the cold, luckily there was another guy in the same situation, so we stuck together. The cold was cruel. It was literally killing us in a slowly way. As if every cell would die off gradually. I can't actually describe it. Fact is, my skin turned blue and purple, I lost feelings in my legs and arms, I couldn't walk properly, it hurt like hell.  I could burn my skin without feeling any pain, the frost in my face made my lips burst bleeding. That was the worst nightmare I've ever experienced. As I arrived in Bristol eventually after all this hours, I couldn't believe to be alive. I've never ever been so thankful for a hot shower in my entire life as in this very moment. I almost cry.          

I will have to pull my heart away

 

WOW! Skateistan, about skateboarders in Afghanistan.

Awfully good!

SKATEISTAN: TO LIVE AND SKATE KABUL from Diesel New Voices on Vimeo.

Going away for my birthday. Spending some nice time with Benji, the forest and the snow. Wagga wagga!
Oh and screaming, broken glass, objects in the air, dogs going crazy and dangerous, people fighting and at the end kicked out the house and landing on the street. What a saturday night, it started so peaceful.  

Oh dear. All the turmoil when it comes to love makes me mad. I'm a passionate, high-spirited little thing and it doesn't happen often but it seems everytime it hits me, it hits me thousand times more than less emotional people.Or maybe this is an explanation:

"The truly creative mind in any field is no more than this: A human creature born abnormally, inhumanly sensitive. To him a touch is a blow, a sound is a noise, a misfortune is a tragedy, a joy is an ecstasy, a friend is a lover, a lover is a god, and failure is death. Add to this cruelly delicate organism the overpowering necessity to create, create, create -- so that without the creating of music or poetry or books or buildings or something of meaning, his very breath is cut off from him. He must create, must pour out creation. By some strange, unknown, inward urgency he is not really alive unless he is creating."
Pearl S. Buck



Basically, I just wish everyone to be happy. Imagine if everybody would be utterly happy and completely in peace with himself and one with our nature, what the world would be like. Only tears of joy, respect, appreciation, good naturedness, pure love, pure hearts. Yeah, that's my wish. If everyone would be happy, nobody would hurt me and nobody would hurt you. Because nobody would have any reason to do so. Most people hurting others only derives from jealousy, hatred, stupidness, indifference, fear and so on. Most people are very unhappy with themselves and need to project their misery on other people by hurting them in order to feel better, to feel they have still power, they're worth something. This is so wrong. Or maybe they just bored. Then I wish everyone a happy and excited life full of loving and caring, motivation, growing and candy explosions. Thanks.   

The other thing is amazing because strangely enough, every guy I fancy is not interested in me. They all rather seem to run away from me. And everybodyelse, I don't fancy, wants to hook up with me. Sigh. A friend once told me, I'm like a danger zone. Everyone feels attractive to me but most of them are afraid of getting burned. Oh dear. What else can I do than hope and live on?

 'Not knowing whether to wait or to forget is the worst kind of suffering'

 

Summertime and the livin' is easy

fish are jumpin' and the cotton is high

one of these mornings you're goin' rise up singing

then you'll spread your wings and you'll take the sky

Yesterday night was epic. Actually the first real night I got fairly wasted since freshers week. Haaaaaaangingggggggg. Didn't know  one pound pizza could taste like plastic. Actually that was by far the most terrible experience I've ever had haha. Oh and I've got this massive scratch over my entire left bum cheek. Wondering where that comes from. Anyway, all exams done. Term 1 finished. Holidays! And so many  sweet plans already. It's gonna be purely enjoyable. 



yeah. hi. how's it going. long time no see. I spent too much time on my assignments. I had to make a night of it and worked on them until 5.30 last morning haha. Music Business, Project Portfolio and music-based CV. Things I've never done before in english. 3 hours sleep and then handed them in at my college. Phewww last  assessment today!!! One month off. Awesome.
Whatelse. Me thinking. Obviously some things happened since my last blog, hmmmm. Can't think cause I just wanna dance right now. bye my lovers. End of Term gig calls woop woop!!

Simple.

Childlike joy.

Childlike heart.

Fear is a manipulative emotion that can trick us
 into living a boring life
Donald Miller

I can't wait till wednesday when some money comes through to buy all the wonderful tickets who will take me to all the wonderful places to all the wonderful people, yesyesyes.  

There is a difference between cheesy and sweet and
this song is mild sweet with crunchy texture

"Happiness is a form of courage." Abraham Lincoln

I had to put it up as well, this picture is just too good. It still makes me laugh every time I look at it. Oh god hahahahahhahhahahhahha Legend! 

by Ben Hildred 

Essays, essays, essays. That's all I have to say. And some rumours. My god people get a life and don't waste my time. It seems I'm a thief today but this song is bombastic! Lekka prospects are expecting me, I'm gonna stay in the UK over Christmas holidays and planning to meet awesomest friends in December. oooooooh excited!  But for now, let's enjoy this song at full volume.I need it.  

 

Today was pretty much awesome as much as demanding! Performance after performance, great feedback, good feeling! 

maybe we sometimes need to feel we’re part of something bigger than ourselves

Competition is a form of separation. First, when you have thoughts of competition, it is coming from a lack mentality, as you are saying there is a limited supply. You are saying there is not enough for everybody, so we have to compete and fight to get things. As you compete you will attract many people, circumstances, and events to compete against you in every single aspect of your life. For your own well-being, you have to get competition out of your mind and become a creative mind. Focus only on your dreams, your visions and being the best that you can be!

Stefen posted those two quotes on Facebook:

“Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens.”

Carl Jung

"The Earth provides enough to satisfy every man's needs, but not every man's greed."  - Mahatma Gandhi

I'm gonna perform this song tomorrow plus Love Story plus Iron Maiden the Wicker Man which I'm gonna be assessed on. I've just posted this as my status. My day so far,  nine till ten thirty Artist Development, ten thirty till one two band rehearsals, back to Bimm, one thirty till three Pre Production, three till five band rehearsal with my third band, buying black jeans for the gig, drinking Rum to smoothen my voice, heading home, having something to eat for the first time, practising. Later on sleeping, getting up at five thirty, taking a shower, talking one hour on Skype with my friend Anna to awaken my voice, warming up, getting ready, off to the boat in the river, auditions at nine, ten and eleven o'clock, back to Uni, Styles and Techniques then Advanced Musicianship, finishing at 6pm. And all that on strong antibiotics. That's the true Rock'n'Roll my dear.  

"How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world."  Anne Frank

"If you judge people, you have no time to love them."

Mother Teresa

On tuesday I'll be auditioned and assessed at Thekla. The boat if you remember. The crazy thing is, it's in the morning at 9 o'clock and at 10 and at 11am with three different bands. Oh dear, I need to get up before six to get my hoarse voice ready. Wow and I really thought, I will have loads of time between my performances. The other thing is, I'm at my third week on antibiotics and the side effects are fairly wearing me out. Whatever.  

Well today is super grey. And the fact it's getting dark in the early afternoon, has been always depressing me. It feels like the end of the day when it isn't. This song is a good song. f o r. n o w.  

I'm dreaming about everything that no one thought to wonder!

Literally running from one band rehearsal to the next, I'm playing in 3 bands so far. Don't even know the bandnames haha, head's a mess. And all because of the auditions and assessments taking place next week. Due to my illness and all the intense singing, my voice is really suffering which sucks. Well no option but to be in peak form next week ey! I wanna see only Distinctions please. 

Sweet practice just now. Looking forward to perform. Have a nice evening.   



'We all know fear, but passion makes it fearless.'

To be in this pic now in a moment forever, oh what I'd do for it!  

this is so cool, I want it as a T-Shirt

Today I had a masterclass with Lou Rhodes. Fascinating and interesting woman. Again pretty inspiring. One of the greatest songs by her band Lamb is Angel Gabriel. Masterclasses are awesome! 

On Tuesday our Vocal course's been in a Studio recording Beach Boys 'Good Vibrations' and Les Miserables 'One more day'. It was really nice. I could do stuff like that constantly.   

'My life has been full of terrible misfortunes most of which never happened'

Michel de Montagne

Pretty memories of a splendid weekend 

by Ben Hildred

I was in a pretty bad state the entire week, did my audition for Live and Lyrical on friday with the lovely help with some fellow students, I'm on the 'maybe' list, fingers crossed! Spent friday till sunday outside of Bristol City of what I didn't think it was a good idea in the first place but it did me good, very relaxed, felt so at ease and I'd been well served by loads of hot milk with honey at my own request, cereals with yoghurt and peanut butter with jam, apparently I'm a weirdo haha or maybe just imaginative.   

Anyway I'm in such a better mood now, I literally feel the up.

To be purely honest, I feel like I've already lost sight of the shore which turns out to be a good thing then hey?

Hello 

Hello (Radio edit) by martinsolveig

This song is so true at the moment. 1 week on antibotics. If this isn't going to help, I really don't know.

Some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity-  Gilda Radner

Masterclass with The Dillinger Escape Plan at Bimm today. They were telling us their experiences as succesful musicians. Fairly instructive and inspiring. Those blokes are more than alright! They are actually pretty damn cool. I got to know this band through this song some years ago.

stand-by mode

please someone switch me on

'Not because it's difficult, we don't dare. Because we don't dare, it's difficult.'

Open Mic yesterday at Bank. Josh, Gulli, Ben and me. Nice one. We definitely gonna try to do it regularly. Other friends popped around as well to have a listen, great night.

 

Free Vegan Food Fair in Bristol today with Danny. Yummy food, nice atmosphere but nobody could beat the raspberry ice-cream. Mmmmmmmmmmm. Stuffed like . More of it, yes! Later a bit Halloween, should be fun.


DARK SIDE OF THE LENS from Astray Films on Vimeo.

And this is probably the coolest music video I've ever seen. Please click on the link below, download Google Chrome, enter any address you know and marvel. The postcard idea is amazing. Go.
http://www.thewildernessdowntown.com/

'I am much inclined to live from my rucksack, and let my trousers fray as they like.'

Hermann Hesse

wow. this. picture. is. perfection.

Open Mic on wednesday at Mr. Wolfs. It was pure fun. Two mates were performing and I did the Backing Vocals. Loved it. I danced and danced and danced and met another guy who danced just as crazy as me, what a laugh. It's amusing every time people stop me and telling me they just fell in love with my Pink Floyd chucks. Well I must say they are really wicked hehe.

Otherwise I miss my mate Marc indescribable. Today is the day he died. It hurts. It's been a year which is incomprehensible for me. Here's a song for him.   

SCATTING

lots of consonants, use of whole range, fast speed, listening to the chords of music and improvising melody on top, using lips and tongue, very articulated

Ha, we did this today in Styles and Techniques. I've never done this before but to my own surprise, I had no problems to do it, I actually really enjoyed it and Oh my god, it was hilarious. At some point always two people had to battle against each other in an argumentative way or trying to sell something on the market and this all in scatting. We were laughing our asses off.    

That's probably the best example to get an idea of scat singing

'What you do, the way you think, makes you beautiful'

Scott Westerfeld

Artist Development at 9 in the morning. I don't know, that's harsh. Way to early to sing! just not a good time for my voice, even when I get up 2 hour earlier to warm it up. Hmmm. Nevermind, we (Off the Cuff) performed our song today,yay. Fun, positive feedback, noice. Had to come up first with a hook and subsequently with an entire song. Not too bad, not too bad. I actually pretty much like it, yeah.    

'You cannot avoid pain, but you can chose to overcome it'

Paulo Coelho

never compare your inside with somebody else's outside 

hugh macleod 

 220.000 Volt

My school is still fantastic, I'm really having fun. Music Music Music. What more could one want?! Ah I love it even though I'm busy as fuck but hey no sweet without sweat right. 

Today happened something awesome, it put a big fat smile on my face. I went to Tesco ( supermarket) and wanted to buy something to eat with my last pennies I own. I went to the self-service machine and it wouldn't scan my food. Makes me think maybe it's just me making them not working haha. Anyway I called a woman and she pressed loads of buttons, asked me if that's all I want, put it in a bag and said go, it's alright. For a second I wasn't moving but then realised she just gave me it for free and walked off!!!!!!!!  In those situations there is no time for stupid questions, you just have to accept it and I did for sure haha. Although I still don't know why I had not to pay for it, I definitely love this Tesco woman! Thanks :)  

 

You are your dreams



My weekend was pretty much perfect. Bestest company, mega sunny and warm day, yummy breakfast, lovely Bristol walkabout, cave discovering, cliff sliding, suspension bridge, beautiful views, snoozing on grass in the sun, playground, ice-cream, free and stunning City Museum and Art Gallery visit, hot-air balloons on the horizon and amazing gig by Dans le Sac vs Sroobius Pip in the evening to top the day. Wow. I've fully enjoyed it. More of it please.      

and this song was playing in the cartoon shop as we had a look at all those super heros 



Damn yeah!

Oh my god, I can't believe how I neglected my blog. I need to organise, everything. I need a structure. Too much chaos. Haven't managed to create a working system yet in those busy days.

Focus

Even though it's going nicely, it could go much better.

Uni is ace, lessons, teachers, classmates. I enjoy it loads. Many songs to learn during the week, it keeps you busy. Been to Laser Quest on Monday due to Chris Birthday, big fun! On Tuesday I had to perform twice at LPW which turned out to be a complete success! I didn't only get positive feedback from my 3 tutors but from my fellow students as well. Wow. I'd  have never expected nor experienced something like this. People who know the music business in and out, who know what they're talking about, being enthusiastic about my performance. I got one P, one M and for the large rest only D's which is the highest mark ever. Overwhelming, especially when Kieron Pepper is giving you the marks. It makes it kinda more high-grade personally. I think it's fair enough to say , regarding my uphill struggle and stony way  to get to this point of my life, I'm proud of myself. It's really paying off now. I appreciate it so much. I'm living the dream seriously. 

Easy tasks don't make skilled artists

Cauliflower [Does it Offend You, Yeah Remix] by le sac Vs Pip

The Astounding Earnest Brace (iTunes Bonus Track) by le sac Vs Pip

Highly important mister is coming tomorrow. I can't wait. Sooooooo excited. 

Yes I feel alright. Busy days. Fun times. 

Oh mama, I wanna go surfing!